The toe incident

This weekend I hurt my toe, well actually I hurt two of the toes on my left foot. Today I am still hobbling and the toes are still somewhat purple and swollen. This is definitively not a good state affairs.

As you may have guessed the incident involved the consumption of a small amount of alcohol. It started out tamely enough with a gin and tonic (well lemon and lime juice as they were out of tonic) at Columbus's scariest bar (the barmaid was flat out insane, at first refusing to serve me and then talking crazy talk about this and that and how she used to speed) and a couple of beers before watching The Weather Man — which I really liked, it's just one of those quirky slice of life films but very well done and quite amusing. After the film the journey home descended into a bar crawl during the course of which I got to watch my 2-0 start to Saturday's gambling descend into a 2-4 disaster. I was not a happy camper, a fact I announced repeatedly during the evening. I even managed to get home and situate myself safely on the sofa before the incident.

It was a simple enough task. Go to the kitchen and get a glass of water to take upstairs to Brit. You'd have thought that even under the worst of all possible worlds the task would not end up with two possible broken toes and toe wet beds. You'd be wrong. For some reason I jogged across to the kitchen, then slipped, smacked into the door frame with my left foot (at which point the toe injury occurred), twisted through the air, fell into the rubbish bin and ended up lying against the wall clutching my foot and nursing a bruised arm. I then proceeded to go upstairs and throw a glass of water over Brit's bed — what can I say it made sense at the time — which led to my bed having a glass of water thrown over it by the time I retired (hurt) for the night.

Today I'm off to the courthouse. It's very exciting. Will I get to see the wheels of American justice turning? Or will Miss Justice lose the baby in a miscarriage? Stay tuned for more exciting updates. (Or don't.)